What is victim consciousness?
How do we navigate it?
The difference between being a victim & living in victim consciousness is active harm.
Even if someone in a state of active harm, they still hold a level of self responsibility. There are still choices they can make, actions they can choose, & decisions to take ownership of.
According to the consciousness.is tools, to be in victim consciousness is to be “at the effect of” x,y,z. When there is no harm present, we enable our victim consciousness by allowing X to become our reason why we cannot take self responsibility or ownership.
For example: if you experienced domestic violence growing up, you may enable your victim by blaming your dad as the reason why you have a hard time dating men, fostering healthy relationships, or feeling secure in intimacy or vulnerability. While your relationship to your father did impact your view/belief of men, it is your responsibility to shift this perspective & become willing to excavate why you’re choosing to dance around the drama triangle.
Does it keep you free from commitment? Do you believe it will save your heart from hardship or disappointment? Does it allow you to stay in resentment? Does it keep it comfortable in what you’ve always known to be true?
Your victim keeps you from taking full responsibility for your life and blocks you from seeing creative solutions. At some point in your life journey, it is wise to remember that you are the common denominator in your life. If the same issue is on repeat, there is something you are not seeing or somewhere you’re being called to claim your ownership.
The victim persona is very likely going to a part of your life forever. The difference is — who’s driving your consciousness?
There’s nothing wrong with befriending your victim or radically loving it. Issues arise when your victim is the factory default setting on your response system or you choose to live your life in perpetual states of victimhood.
The first time I snapped out of my victimhood was in an abusive situation. I had moved across country to work for a couple I deeply believed in, even though I saw some concerning behaviors from the husband. Turns out he was worse than I could imagine & he began to financially control me, as well as perpetuate emotional/spiritual abuse towards me.
After a huge blow up & manic episode on his part, I sat at the kitchen table bawling. Angrily, he came to me, face to face, & said,
“Stop crying. You’re not a fucking victim.”
I looked him dead in the eyes, tears instantly drying up, & said, “thank you.”
In that moment, he freed me. He reminded me of my power. He supported me in claiming my authority.
He was so right. I was not a victim to him. I had experienced abuse, degradation, & wounding, but I had my creative power and GOD.
I left the house, went back to my apartment, & began praying. As I sat at my altar, I asked God to show me what to do, how to take control of my life, how to get out of that mess.
I downloaded The Plan™️ & began my escape.
Knowing my options were limited by the lack of money I had in my bank account, I got very creative with my network + resources. I found temporary housing for work-trade, I called in financial favors, & I choose to live in integrity.
Beloved, it was terrifying.
The threat of bodily harm was present in my mind for many weeks, and the insecurity of it all made it very shaky.
It all worked… better than imagined.
It was through this experience, in a new state, 3,000 miles away from my family that I realized God had given me a power that could never be destroyed.
But I’m NOT special.
YOU possess this power too.
This power comes through self responsibility and creative possibility. This power comes from choosing to expand beyond what’s comfortable & what you’re accustomed to.
Your victim can keep you in loops of self-betrayal, sabotage, & stagnancy. Knowing that you have choice teaches you how creative & powerful you truly are. Choosing to shift your perspective gives you an opportunity to see solutions you might have missed/not believed in.
Self mastery is priceless.
If you’d like to work on the tools of self mastery, unpack your victim, & learn how to take self responsibility, book a mentorship session with me here. Use code SELFMASTER33 to save $33 on this session.